Off we go!

Left Sacramento yesterday morning at around 8:30am.  Had a snafu renting the vehicle so we got a bit later of a start than we would have liked.  However, we managed to get into Salem, OR by 6:30pm. We were instantly greeted with homemade spaghetti, which my mom had prepared with love. ;) It was a nice comfort food after a long day on the road with an 11 month old kid. Kaya was quite happy most of the way to Salem, but the last three or so hours of our trip dragged on and on and on and on and.... well you get the point.

Since we arrived here, we've been eating well, chillin' with good company, jammin' on guitar, and resting up for tomorrow's plane trip to Fayetteville, AR. Can't wait to see what we're in for once we get there!

Until the next post.... (when things should be a li'l more interesting). Thanks for reading!  

Off to Arkansas April 27th!

Alright, so here's the deal.  If you've followed our blog, you know by now how much Matt and I crave to live a "down-to-earth" lifestyle.  For the last year or so, we've been trying to get into WWOOFing. WWOOF stands for Worldwide Opportunities on Organic Farms and it is an organization that connects farmers who need/want help to people who are interested in learning about farming.  All the while, the majority of host farms provide food and shelter to the volunteer interns.

So Matt and I have been looking and looking within the USA on the WWOOF website, and finally got in touch with a farmer in Arkansas who puts to practice Masanobu Fukuoka's philosophy of farming.  Fukuoka does not believe in tilling the soil at any point in the farming process.  He also avoids use of synthetic fertilizers and pesticides.  Needless to say, Foundation Farm in Arkansas is the perfect match for us in that it follows all of these principles.  In addition the farmer, Patrice, is connected with two farmer's markets nearby and has a farm school with the intention of training people like Matt and myself who want to own a small-scale farm of their own in the near future. Patrice runs an organic vegetable farm which consists of approximately 60 rows.

You might be curious as to why we want this so much.  Matt has already given notice with his job at Aerojet as manufacturing engineer and everybody in his workplace has been surprised to say the least at our decision to up and leave.  At the same time, many people seem inspired.  We hear a lot of comments like "It takes a lot of guts to do what you're doing. So you're selling all your stuff?!  Why do you want to leave a stable job and be a farmer?"  It's not easy to put into words why we like the idea of farming.  I know that there is a lot to learn about the outdoors and I've always been one to explore.  Matt is, indeed, an explorer as well and we all know at Kaya's age she is quite interested in finding out what's around the corner. I don't mean to offend when I say I find the white-collar lifestyle we live now to be stagnant and dull. I feel privileged but not in a good way. I feel spoiled. I look at other countries and see the differences in their lifestyles and ours and become - to put it bluntly - disgusted with myself.  I instantly think "how is it that I have so much excess when there are people everywhere around me who actually need?"

In leaving for Arkansas, we are cleansing ourselves of all our needless belongings.  I must say, however, that we are storing a few items at my mom's house because they are items we find extremely hard to part with.  For example, we're not keeping our Wii or most of our clothes, but we're keeping pictures we have yet to digitize of our childhood and our parents' childhood. There are items we are emotionally tied to and it actually brings us to tears to think of not having them anymore.  Anyway, we're not taking much to Arkansas with us because we want to be free of things.  We want to travel light and only seek comfort in the companionship of each other and those around us.  We want to comfort ourselves by witnessing firsthand what it means to give without wanting in return.

Well that's all I'm up for writing right now.  Please comment on our post if you have questions or concerns.  We look forward to sharing adventurous stories with you VERY soon!

Things I hope I never forget

Kaya:

your baby laugh
your toothless and your two-toothed grin
your warm tiny hands

how my thumb fits into the palm of your hand
how you hold my thumb with your hand
how you cuddle into my side to fall asleep at night and sometimes for naps

how you reach over to me when you aren't asleep at my side to get closer
how you cry in protest when you see me leaving after you've just about drifted off to sleep
how you fall asleep while I'm holding you

how you brush the inside of my arm gently with the back and front of your hand as you nurse
the way you put your hands together when I clap and say "yay!" to you
how you try to put leaves in your mouth
how you "fake" laugh before a bit of root vegetables is spooned into your mouth

how you smile at Winnie the Pooh when I sing the "Winnie the Pooh" song
how you laugh when daddy holds you and lightly bounces with you in his arms
how you stare at me as you try to fall asleep

how sometimes when you're staring at me and you notice me smiling, you slowly crack a smile
how when you saw Misha you would kick your legs and breathe fast in excitement
how you kiss me with your mouth open wide
how when I'm holding you, your head sometimes clunks into my chest tiredly

These are the things I hope I never forget because they are things that bring me peace and happiness!
Love you, Kaya!

the life of a mom

I am thinking these days of what it means to be a mom.  A bit of reflection has brought me to the conclusion that I have a hard time being anything BUT a mom.  I no longer sing in the choir that I enjoy so much, I no longer run with my hands free (literally and I guess I could say metaphorically as well), and every "break" I take from watching my girl I think about how she's doing and wonder if she's okay.  I have, however, recently agreed to join a soccer team which is a huge step towards finding a long lost part of me.  Before having a child, soccer and music were what defined me.  Now, with little interaction in either hobby, I am left with living for somebody else and finding ways to define myself through other actions.

I don't mean for this post to sound as if I don't appreciate my life as a mom, but I believe all moms realize sooner or later they have a hard time being anything outside of a mom. I love Kaya more than words can say and at the same time I love the freedom I felt without the responsibility of watching out for my baby.  My point is, I've cast aside all other things that defined me since becoming a mom and I am scared to know that I will probably have to find more to be than a mom when Kaya is all grown up.  How will I do that?  After many years of having dedicated my heart and soul to her, how will I be able to be anything other than a mom?

Another thing, I do not discredit what it means to be a mom.  I don't mean to say "other than a mom" as an insult or to sound as if I mean "just a mom".  Being a mom means the world to me and I have never felt more like a woman than I do now, protecting my young and showing her how to live freely and peacefully.  I'm undoubtedly honored.  Even so, there is still a lingering anguish, knowing I have been other things in the past and that I loved being those things.  And I lament over having lost those parts of me, at least for the time being.  I want so badly to balance my past self with my current self and feel it is impossible.

One of the most intriguing parts of being a mom I have discovered is that sometimes I feel more alone than I have ever felt before.  Odd, because we have new life around!  But, friends I think or thought I had lose touch, people who I used to understand, I don't understand anymore and similarly, people I didn't understand before, I understand better now.  But in all the day-to-day of raising Kaya, I somehow never see anybody, let alone talk to anybody.  There are days I feel like I might as well have not even said a word.  The world we live in can be so strange.  We spend all of our time getting through the day so we can hurry up and get to the next.  I am upset that I don't get to be a family with Matt.  He works more than 40 hours a week and misses a lot of the things that Kaya and I do together.  I'm afraid he may miss hearing her first word, or seeing her really crawl for the first time, or walk even. I don't understand how we (as a people) have allowed ourselves to let life pass us by.  Why do we live in a system where we are stuck doing the same thing every day? Aren't we meant to be travelers? If we were travelers, we would find a way to eat and make shelter because our lives depended on it yet we do the same thing now as stationary workers.  Our lives depend on how much work we put out, but we're bored and we never spend time with the people we care about.  Since becoming a mom, I don't want to settle for less.  I want to be a family who travels and works together to make ends meet.  Anyway, I have much more on my mind and plenty more to say, but I don't know how to say it anymore and it feels all jumbly.  If you've made it this far in my post, thanks for reading and I hope I haven't disturbed your peace.  Every once in a while, I need to write my frustrations down so I can figure out what to do next.  So, that is all.

Until next time, everybody!

Seed choice

The garden is doing pretty well this year. I have about 200 lbs. of veggies. I spent about $40 for supplies this year. That puts the cost per pound at $0.20. Not too bad. I still have a  lot to pick. I have a volunteer pumpkin that is slowly taking over the yard! With the addition of Kaya, I've been too busy to be putzing outside much.

Also some good news: the chickens are laying eggs. Well, one chicken lays eggs, one has yet to produce. But 9 chickens, 4 years, and 2 states later we had an egg! Per cost on that first egg would be astronomical, maybe around $150. But each eggs brings that number down. We are up to 12 eggs. We also found out we had a rooster and two hens.

We released the rooster in a rooster-friendly part of town. It was pretty entertaining to watch all the roosters intimidate the new guy.

What do I want to eat next year? I plan on using all seeds for cost reasons. I also want to use natural, organic, and non-genetically modified seed. Based on this year's crop and what time of year we will move into the new house, I want to grow the following:

• Tomatoes - no cherry tomatoes, I've saved some seed from two big mutants this year. One was doing something like a Fibonacci helix.
• bell peppers - not much came from these this year so I'll try to have more next year.
• hot peppers - jalapeno, serrano, poblano
• summer squash - zuch, crookneck maybe - I lost track of these this year and too many got BIG
• cucumber - pickling kind - I made 1 jar of good pickles this year
• beans - string,  black, or pinto beans 
• melon - water, and maybe a John Bidwell Casaba that my great great grandfather developed!
• basil - hard to have too much basil
• rosemary
• oregano
• mint
• corn - I saved the only three ears I got and plan on replanting those
• rice - my family has a rice farm outside of town. I'd like to try doing the Fukuoka method where you don't have standing water.
• strawberries

And depending on space:

• apple
• blueberry
• peach
• apricot
• plum
• onion
• potato

Baker Creek Heirloom Seed has a seed variety pack with many of these seeds in there.

That should cover summer pretty well.

Things I've learned from gardening this year:

• Move the garden and chickens as close to the kitchen as possible
• Soaker hoses are not perfect.
• Chickens need a better watering system that the trough-resevoir bucket
• Chickens need a more reliable feeder than me
• Check to see where the sewer access is before planting
• Use more mulch
• Roosters are ornery 
• Chicken poop is great
• Chickens are great fun to watch and be around but they are (comically) stupid and messy

Kaya Juniper Slakey

Alright, so here's the news!  Kaya was born May 25, 2012 at 1:12am.  She surprised the heck out of us when she was born because we were both so sure she was going to be a boy!  So much for gut feeling, eh?  She was 8.5 pounds, 20 inches long.  Eight weeks have already gone by, yet I feel like it's been so much longer.

It can be so emotional being a parent.  I cry all the time just from knowing she's my kid.  I can't believe she's my daughter!  She's amazing and beautiful!  I cry when she's hurting or when I feel I can't help her, or when I'm happy just to see her and study her.  I cry when she calms in my arms, or when I'm overwhelmed by the loads of work to do around the house in addition to tending to her needs.

In all these moments, no matter how hard or easy, I have no regrets.  Sometimes I wish I could go back to where it was just Matt and me, because I miss what it feels like to do whatever we want, whenever we want, but then I think about Kaya and how much she means to me and I don't really want to go back.  I enjoy having her in our lives so much and I think, soon, Matt and I will be able to be just the two of us again, here and there.  Date night!  Yet, I also look forward to nights where the three of us go out together and play; kick the soccer ball around at a park, fly a kite, walk to the dog park, bike around to feel the delta breeze.  It's all so exciting!!!

Anyway, I'm cutting this blog short.  I am prepping to go to New York tomorrow with Matt and Kaya for Virginia and David's wedding! We will share the same anniversary date as them, which I think is awesome and unique.  We will never forget to say happy anniversary to them, since it will be the same date as ours.  ;)  Ta for now, Followers!

PS -  apologize for the sappiness.  I have always felt free to express myself sappily since I don't mind the potential embarrassment...  

Mr. Stork?

I don't think we've blogged about this in the past so allow me to share the news.  We're having a kid!!! We've known for more than enough time.  I'm (Kareena) almost 39 weeks along (not Matt - that'd be weird) so the kid will arrive very soon.  Well, in case you're wondering, this is a planned joy that has already changed our lives forever.

We're currently awaiting Mr. Stork with great anticipation. I look forward to meeting our child at the perfect moment whenever that moment be.  I am writing to share the emotions that I feel should be expressed during a parent's "waiting period."  For me, the waiting period began as soon as we knew we were going to have a kid.  This is the time that is exciting and unknown and filled with memories that last a lifetime.

I remember the adrenaline rush I had telling Matt we were expecting and his reaction to the news.  It's somewhat comical that even though couples plan to have children, the minute they find out it's real, it still seems unbelievable and surprising.  It took a long time to adjust to the knowledge of our inevitable change even though we certainly knew well in advance that this would be life-changing.

I vividly remember the first time Matt was able to feel the baby move.  I had been able to feel the baby for weeks but had not been able to get Matt to feel the "bumps" at the right moment.  When he was finally able to feel the baby move, I laughed excitedly and nervously.  I was so happy that he got to feel the "proof" of what I had been feeling.  Now, the baby moves all the time and Matt is sure to experience our kid's movements at any given day.  Another memorable moment was when Matt had his hand resting on the baby and it rolled a knee or foot so strongly against his hand that he exclaimed "Jesus! Was that the baby?"  I laughed loudly as I responded "Well, that certainly wasn't me."

The general feeling over these last nine months has been that of pure elation.  We hear a lot of warnings and advice from friends about the trials of parenthood, which is expected, but we like to keep in mind that our upcoming challenges will be viewed as a long string of adventures, guaranteed to push us to the limit as well as create the greatest sense of accomplishment.  We trust that we will be loving, patient, and empathetic parents, learning many lessons along the way.  So bring it on, Mr. Stork!  We're willing and ready!